I don't know.

I don't know if I should tell you anytime soon.. Like you do wanna know as soon as possible.. It shows.
But how am I suppose to tell you if it doesn't even look like you really wannna know? This is sooo hard for me.
I don't understand my feelings anymore. Well more like sometimes.. It's cause I'm seeing the worst side.
Like look at this number one fact: our age gap. That sorta bothers me but you told me "Its jst numbers" so what does that mean?
Does that mean you're down to be with me too? See.. I don't know.
And number two fact: look at the girls you roll around with and compare them to me.. I strongly believe that there is no fucking way I could be like them anytime soon. In 3 years maybe but definitely not now. Gosh!!! This is making me so sad :(
The thought that I have the strongest feelings for you the first time we bonded together. The good and the bad.. I'd never forget that.
And your texts.. They're all like stored in my phone and I read them constantly. Call me obsessed or whatever but I just love it.
Also, the fact that when you text me and give me hints how you wanna know this "something" I've always wanted to tell you and how it's interesting.. It leads me on..
So what does that mean? I don't fucking know.
Like I don't even know how to tell you how I feel when we get together one day, which is I know for a fact is soon. Legit soon!
8( it's so hard on me. Seeing you constantly makes me wanna melt down, not gonna fucking lie.
I've always wanted to text you first but I couldn't! Cause there is such thing "let him text you first once in a while.." ugh